Dating in your 20’s: Communication Struggles

I think almost everyone has been at a point in their dating life, where they felt they were on a merry go round that never stopped. Im sure we all have had intentions that we set for a new person that we were dating that wasn’t always met. But why is that?

Communicating Intentions:

Often times, people aren’t communicating their intentions properly upon meeting someone new. In my opinion, your intentions should be communicated before the first date. But, as long as it’s communicated in the early stages there shouldn’t be room for confusion or any miscommunication.

A major reason for people failing to communicate is usually because they’re assuming that their intentions would be opposite of the person they’re dating. We have to understand that we must always be on the same page and have the same intentions as people we choose to date. If you personally want something casual then SAY THAT. Who’s to say that your partner/friend doesn’t want the same thing. And if they don’t want the same thing, give them that freedom to make the decision if they want to continue or bounce.

Our feelings shouldn’t be hurt if a person communicates intentions that are indifferent of our personal intentions. But it all depends on the timing. It’s okay to communicate your intentions in the early stages. However, when we wait till months, and even sometimes years, to communicate intentions it’s nearly heartbreaking for some people. The biggest policy is honesty, and if you can’t give your partner the decency of honesty in the early stages, the relationship will most likely be unstable.

Communicating in Relationships:

When it comes to relationships, communication can make or break your relationship. Communication along with trust needs to be the foundation. It’s not just letting your partner know your daily routine, but its learning how to communicate your feelings and emotions. You have to pay close attention to what types of things upset your partner. You also need to observe and determine the sensitivity and emotional levels of your partner. You have to understand that just because some things aren’t a big deal to you, it may be hurtful for your partner. All in all, you have to be considerate of your partner’s feelings.

You should feel comfortable expressing your feelings to your partner. The biggest mistake a person can make is bottling it in, because when it finally comes out its not pretty. I understand it’s easier said than done, but it’s something that we all could work towards. It can be extremely hard to have a romantic partner who isn’t emotionally available.

Communicating Love Languages:

Communicating your love language with your partner can help with your overall communication. The five love languages are words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. Everyone has a distinct way in which they receive love. You want to find ways to make your partner happy and ways to love more effectively.

Communication isn’t something that can be fixed over night. But I challenge those that are single/dating and those in relationships to evaluate ways they can communicate better to their partner/friend. I also recommend everyone take the love language test online, to see the proper way they receive love.